Home » Connecting with God » Monday Moments » (You don’t have to) Try

(You don’t have to) Try

A Monday Moment.

I remember the first time I heard Colbie Caillat. Tim and I were on our first date after Jack was born when Realize came on over the speakers at California Pizza Kitchen. I think we were both listening to the lyrics, because we caught each others’ eye and grinned foolishly at one another. From that moment on I was hooked to Colbie’s music, so when I saw the headline Colbie Caillat Is Tired of Being Photoshopped: Here’s What She Did About It I had to read the article.

I’m so glad I did.

It turns out, she wrote another song. And not just a beautiful song, but an awesome music video to go with it. One that left me in tears and built my sense of self. (see below)

Here’s what I love about it: It’s Vulnerable, It’s Honest, It’s Beautiful, It’s Freeing. 

With great bravery – and joy – the women in the video display their willingness not to try so hard and took off all of their makeup, their false hair, their masks to reveal who they truly are behind it all. It is rare to see such truth.

In the article Colbie praised the beauty of the other women in the video.

“All of the women were amazing. My favorite was the woman who has no hair. I first saw her completely bald, no makeup, with a huge smile, she was just so happy and confident. She was so beautiful to me. And then we kept getting more hair and makeup on, and the next scene I saw where she’s in full make-up and wig, I was like, Who is this woman? She was not the same person. She still looked beautiful but it wasn’t the same beauty that I saw when she was liberated, showing who she really was.” (Emphasis mine)

I watched the video in breathless anticipation, waiting to see her – who is it? Who is bald?! And when I saw her shake her hairless head, letting it all “down,” I saw the laughter in her eyes and the beauty of her skin and the joy in her smile and I felt a piece of me fall in love with her and desire that same inner beauty. The kind that no one can tell you how to “put on,” but which comes from the power of God in us and Receiving Love.

And there was another girl; with full make up, she had black eyelashes, a perfect complexion, straight red hair – gorgeous. Without it – get this! – she has blonde eyelashes!! I have blonde eyelashes! She has freckles!! I have freckles!! I was so giddy that there was a girl in the video who looked like me, I cannot even tell you. Those things I have been told make me look tired, or blemished, or unpretty – there she was, proudly displaying them all. And she was gorgeous.

I’m tired of living in a society telling me to be perfect I’m not perfect. One that seduces me and millions of women to fork over thousands and thousands of dollars in products to “get it right.” Whether that’s in make-up or clothing, furniture or cleaning supplies, or even the nicest diaper bag or five hundred dollar jogging stroller that 89% of parents won’t actually use…

And I have nothing intrinsically against any of these things. Like Colbie said in the article, I “love getting all dolled up.” I like putting on a pretty dress, nice make-up and curling my hair. I love it when the house looks perfect and when I have nice things.

I just want to know (like Colbie) that it’s ok for me to NOT do those things as well.

That I can leave the house with blonde eyelashes.

That I have value no matter what I look like or do.

That I don’t have to try so hard.

And I want the same things for you too.

“Cause I like you.”

The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.

1 Samuel 16:7 (NLT)

What matters is not your outer appearance—the styling of your hair, the jewelry you wear, the cut of your clothes—but your inner disposition.

1 Peter 3:3 (The Message)

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